Let’s look at his Word to
find out. I'm referring to a plain reading of relevant scriptures.
The first word that refers
to the role of “wife” in Genesis 2:18 is the word HELPER. This concept is mentioned before marriage, or
even gender, because it predates them, and even caused them.
But
for Adam [h] no suitable helper was
found. 21 So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and
while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs [i]
and closed up the place with flesh. 22 Then the LORD God made a woman from the
rib [j] he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.
23 The man said,
"This is now bone of my bones
and flesh of my
flesh;
she shall be
called 'woman, [k] '
for she was
taken out of man."
24 For this reason a man will leave his father
and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
In summary, God did all this
in order to create a suitable helper for Adam (v 20). This is the reason women were created. This
means that even women with a gift of singleness
are created to be helpers as well. An example
of this is that Jesus (Matthew
27:55) and Paul received so much help from women during their
travels.
This passage is the first
and foundation verse on topics of sexuality.
We know this because Jesus and the Apostles keep referring back to it as
they elaborate upon it with more explicit teaching on marriage, divorce,
marriage roles, gender roles etc.
1. The fact (from Gen 2:23) that the woman is of the
man’s own flesh (rib) is used by Christ to clarify God’s law regarding divorce.
Matt
19:3-9
3
Some Pharisees came to him to test him. They asked, "Is it lawful for a
man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?"
4
"Haven't you read," he replied, "that at the beginning the
Creator 'made them male and female,'
5
and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united
to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'?
6
So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let
man not separate."
7
"Why then," they asked, "did Moses command that a man give his
wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?"
8
Jesus replied, "Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your
hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.
9
I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except
for marital unfaithfulness, and marries another woman commits
adultery."
2. Later, Paul refers to Gen 2:20 implicitly
below, supporting his headship teaching regarding gender roles in 3 different
places.
1 Corinthians 11:3
Now
I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the
woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.
1 Corinthians 11:7
7A man ought not to cover his head,[b] since he is the image and glory of God; but
the woman is the glory of man. 8For man did not come from woman, but woman from man;
9neither was man created for woman, but woman for
man.
(in Context) 1
Corinthians 11 (Whole Chapter)
1
Tim 2:8-15
8 I want men everywhere to lift up holy
hands in prayer, without anger or disputing.
9 I also want women to dress modestly, with
decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive
clothes,
10 but
with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.
11 A woman should learn in quietness and full submission.
12 I do not
permit a woman to teach or to have authority over a man; she must be
silent.
13 For
Adam was formed first, then Eve.
14 And Adam was not the one deceived; it
was the woman who was deceived and became a sinner. (NIV)
|
With men’s position of
headship, also comes our responsibility to not to lord it over women, but to
serve them as Christ serves us. 2
Corinthians 1:24
Luke 22:24-26 (New International Version) 24Also
a dispute arose among them as to which of them was considered to be greatest.
25Jesus said to them, "The kings of the Gentiles lord it over
them; and those who exercise authority over them call themselves Benefactors.
26But you are not to be like that. Instead, the greatest among you
should be like the youngest, and the one who rules like the one who serves. |
A man’s reflecting and
sharing Christ’s love takes on a special meaning for a wife, because he becomes
to her a mystical type of Christ (1 Corinthians 11:3, Eph 5:23):
Ephesians
5:25
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up
for her
Ephesians
5:24-26 (in Context) Ephesians
5 (Whole Chapter)
Colossians
3:19
Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.
Colossians
3:18-20 (in Context) Colossians
3 (Whole Chapter)
1 Corinthians 11:3
Now
I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the
woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.
Ephesians 5
22Wives,
submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23For
the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his
body, of which he is the Savior. 24Now as the church submits to
Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
25Husbands,
love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to
make her holy, cleansing[b] her by the washing with water through the
word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without
stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28In
this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who
loves his wife loves himself. 29After all, no one ever hated his own
body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— 30for
we are members of his body. 31"For this reason a man will leave
his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one
flesh."[c] 32This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church.
33However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves
himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
3. So, there again in Eph 5:32, Paul quotes Gen
2:20-23, and states that it is a profound mystery. Indeed, headship and unity are two concepts
that would seem hard to fit into the same relationship. But headship through
Christ actually brings unity in Christ.
This is Christian marriage. This
statement is also true for his church as a whole.
I
Peter
1Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands
so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without
words by the behavior of their wives, 2when they see the purity and
reverence of your lives. 3Your beauty should not come from outward
adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine
clothes. 4Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the
unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet
spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. 5For this is the
way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make
themselves beautiful. They were submissive
to their own husbands, 6like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if
you do what is right and do not give way to fear. 7Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your
wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you
of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.
8Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the
Lord.
|
Husbands |
Wives |
|
Love (Colossians
3:19) |
Submit ( |
|
Die/ give himself up for (Ephesians
5:25) |
Obey husband (I Peter 5-6) |
|
Make her holy. cleanse[b] her by the washing with water through the
word (Ephesians 5:26) |
do not give way to fear (I
Peter 6) |
|
Do not be harsh with them
(Colossians
3:18-20) |
Have gentle and quiet
spirit (I Peter 4) |
|
Provide (1 Tim 5:8, Ex 21:10-11) |
be busy at home (Titus
2:3-5) |
|
Protect (Ex 21:10-11) |
Be subject to their
husbands (Titus 2:3-5) |
|
be considerate as you live with your wives (I Peter 7) |
Respect husband (Eph 5:24) |
|
treat them with respect as
the weaker partner (I Peter 7) |
|
|
Love wife as he loves himself
(Eph 5:24) |
|
This is how God defines
marriage. The mystery of headship is a
beautiful picture of Christ and his bride.
But God solves the mystery by giving us these clear commands regarding how to
be a Christian spouse.
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